Monday, January 09, 2006

Throw the money off the train

A few days ago I heard the cry "outlaw fundraisers in Washington," now Ruth Marcus in Derail These Fundraisers doesn't want the Barton Train to roll. At least he's in his district. The local wildlife might be able to gobble some of the crumbs swept off the train.

Now I shouldn't say this because up here in the real swamp, election day can be fun. There's a good spread of cookies and donuts and ginger ale and plenty of good talk -- last year about the wolf on the island -- a real one not the Republican one. (I should say, since history is my bag, that when George Washington ran for the Virginia House, he provided a more considerable spread with good liquor to boot.)Anyway, here's my idea: completely deregulate elections and allow candidates to buy votes. This will energize the electorate. When folks see votes in the swing states being bought for $100, they will start thinking when the pollsters call. We will grow that undecided vote. Plus the pols will no longer bribe their districts and states with big government projects, new roads, airports, all of which drain those wetlands vital to my survival.

So let old Barton have his train, let it stop at every station, let those corporations load it with money and let old Barton divvy it out to plain folks who, I hope, will go hemming and hawing all the way to the bank and then see what anybody else has to offer. And then in the privacy of the votiing booth, they might surprise everyone and vote for an honest man.

Swamp Minder

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